Friendships

This post really resonated with me and I hope it can resonate with someone else too.

diaryofatwentysomething

“Life is an awful, ugly place to not have a best friend.”
– Sarah Dessen, Someone Like You

If someone told me a few short years ago that this quote would apply to me and my life right now, I’d look at my friends, look at the person, look back at my friends and then look back at that person (pause) and fall into a hysterical fit of laughter. See I never imagined I’d have no friends, I always had friends, even in secondary school when my ‘friends’ at the time turned on me, I found a new clique to hang out with, but I am not in secondary school anymore, I’m no longer a teenager, and the reality is friendships at least for me are harder to form and that’s not for lack of wanting.

I really don’t know what happened to all the close friends I once had…

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A Podcast Episode Featuring Me

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272-Alexandria Hayden.

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 MURMUR PODCAST 

As a part of a Self-Discovery Mission, I decided to Travel to New York City in June 2018 all by myself. I would end up having an amazing time, meeting new friends, seeing old friends, loving my Airbnb and finding the best AirBnB experience of all time.

I have always loved listening to Podcasts and I thought that nothing could be better than to actually be on a podcast myself. When I saw the opportunity to feature on a World Famous Podcast, I knew I couldn’t pass up the opportunity. While it was nerve wracking at first to be going to a strangers home to discuss random topics for the world to hear, it was really a wonderful and enlightening experience and the highlight of my trip from Toronto to New York City.

Luc is an amazing host and was such a pleasure to meet. From the amazing Turkish Coffee reading to the hilarious warm ups before the show, it was truly an eventful experience. Within 10 minutes of being in his apartment, I felt right at home and by the end, I felt as if I had made a new friend in New York City.

I left his Lower Manhattan setup that afternoon feeling hopeful about life and positive about my ability to make new connections. No matter where you go in the world, you will always find new people that feel similar to you and you can connect with them on various levels too. This experience taught me that and I am forever thankful that I will have this reminder to remember the day from.

I hope to one day have a podcast in Toronto where I can talk to strangers and become friends with them. I think that would be pretty amazing. To learn about others is the best way to get to know more about yourself. I think that this whole concept is pretty cool.

Thank you Murmur Podcast. Thank you Luc. Thank you New York City.

Link to the episode:  MURMUR PODCAST 

10 Things I Learned During a Year of Severe Depression (Part 1)

  1. The people you thought would always be there for you won’t be when shit hits the fan
  2. You may be too much to handle
  3. You need to deposit a dollar into a piggy bank each day as a thanks to the Gods for still being alive so you can spend it on Starbucks when you feel better
  4. Some of your friends actually have unconditional love for you and you need to fight for them
  5. Things will be okay on some days and not on others
  6. It is completely okay to cry. People will get it and not care
  7. Put anything too stressful on hold for now and get to it later. Your mental health is more important than your timeline
  8. Walk every day
  9. Take your vitamins
  10. Find a blog that you resonate with. Mine is http://advicefromatwentysomething.com/

Enjoy 🙂

You Need 2 Things: Motivation & Encouragement

Today, I listened to Corey Calliet’s Instagram video where he discussed the two things we need to be successful in life: Motivation and Encouragement. We get encouragement from others and that’s why we need to surround ourselves with positive and supportive people. We also need to then find motivation and that comes from within. These are Corey’s 4 principles for staying motivated:

  1. Dedication
  2. Discipline
  3. Consistency 
  4. Sacrifice

You need these 4 principles plus encouragement to find success in anything you do.

Preparation + Opportunity = Luck

Stay lucky. Stay Motivated. Be Encouraging.

3 Things (29/04/2018)

  1. I don’t know why I did it, but my nosiness got the best of me and I decided to watch the Instagram story of my former best friend’s girlfriend. They were all going out and having fun together, just like we used to all do. It was painful to watch in a way. To see the life I once had and I could still have had if I didn’t act crazy at the end of a really bad and painful breakup. I can’t blame anyone but myself anymore and I have to understand that this is my karma. I am getting exactly what I deserve. I hope that one day the universe will bless me, somehow, with an amazing group of friends that I will not take for granted. I hope to be able to find my people once again.
  2. Falling out of love is hard. You keep searching for the answers and the way to process your feelings faster but you just can’t find one. I don’t know. Maybe one day I just will not feel sad about it anymore. I don’t know.
  3. I have realized that I basically ruined my relationship. I kind of did have a good guy. He wasn’t perfect by any means, but he really did love me and sometimes having love and support is the most important thing. Hopefully, I will find something like that again and if I don’t I will always be grateful for the time I had it.

Look At Every Toxic Behaviour In Your Life

7ac4ff9ec3ef0618f8a044601cfed4b5In order to change your life, you need to look at every toxic behaviour in your life.

A lot of people hate to look at themselves and define themselves, especially the ‘ugly’ parts of their personalities. We all have faults and none of us are perfect.

In order to move forward, let go, and understand who YOU are, you need to understand how you got to that place. In order to grow, you need to become more emotionally intelligent. In order to become more emotionally intelligent, you need to understand how your negative (or toxic) behaviours have brought you to the place you are today. Only then can you change your future.

We all make mistakes in our pasts and some are more detrimental than others. It is important to understand that we can change our lives at any moment we decide to for the better. We cannot change the past but we can change the future. Once you understand that you can make your future much brighter than your past ever was, then you can start to grow and change as a person.

Commit to improving yourself by 1% per day, everyday, until you are the best version of you. Then, when you feel that you are the best you can be, put that 1% per  day into maintaining that sense of self you have created. You will feel much happier and healthier mentally when you do so.

Love yourself wholly enough to look at yourself completely. When you make peace with who you used to be, you can become who you NEED to be and your world will become a brighter place.

You can do it.