No More #3Things

Hi Everyone,

I have made a decision to stop writing my #3things posts. To be honest, I was writing them during a time of extremely great depression and while I am still dealing with the residual effects of the depression, I have realized that I don’t need to write out #3things to share with the world whenever I am feeling down or hopeless. I can now cry it out and go for a walk and embrace the world with a smile no matter how challenging it might appear to initially be. I am a little bit more hopeful today that I was 2 months ago and I think that is a blessing in disguise.

Thank you all for reading my posts. I hope to be writing more positive blog content moving forward.

Sincerely,

Alexandria

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3 Things (27/03/2018)

  1. I woke up this morning and he wasn’t on my mind so I think that this is a silent blessing in disguise. Maybe I am really starting to let go and move on and learn to unlove day by day.
  2. I put a lot of effort into looking cute and beautiful today and I hope that this mood will last. I even have a desire to get my nails done today. Maybe I should?
  3. I am going to work and then to have coffee with a friend. It is going to be a good day today.

What It Means to Take a Risk

 

Going through a breakup has had me seeking inspiration from a variety of sources (on the internet and through people). These sources could simply be comedic or sad or happy but what I realized most of all is that I was looking for an answer to my heart ache and pain. I was looking for an answer to my disposition and sadness. I was looking for the answer from the world as to why someone couldn’t love me the way I loved them. Ultimately, I couldn’t find an answer but what I did find was a video on YouTube by Ashley C. Ford about love and risk.

Love and risk.

What does that mean?

I had to listen to this video 11 times before I truthfully had the answer I was looking for within myself. When you love someone, you risk it all for them. You fight. Ford said “Love is active”. When you love someone, you fight and open up yourself to someone else. You risk your heart in order to be with someone else. Love should make you grow and prosper. You fight for this to happen. As I listened to this talk I realized that while my relationship had love, it never had fight.

The second thing that Ford said was a quote from Maya Angelou, “Love Liberates, it doesn’t bind”. It really does. Love allows you to open up and to free yourself emotionally because you have found someone that you trust enough to break down your walls with and let in. You have found freedom in your love. That is a beautiful thing. She also said about her partner was, “he has never asked me to be less so that he could be more…he has only encouraged me to expand…he has liberated me in some ways”. I realized that in my relationship, I was not asked to be less so that he could be more, but I always FELT that I had to be less so that he could be more. I felt that I had to work less to give him more of my time so that he could be happy. I felt like I had to do less because he was doing nothing, and that made me feel stagnant and frustrated. I never felt liberated with this man. I felt stuck. I didn’t feel encouraged to expand. I felt encouraged to stand still. While he has now found some degree of success in his life (from what I can see), I have determined that we were not for each other as we could not spawn the desire for more within each other. We could not liberate each other. For that reason, you must let go.

The third thing Ashley Ford says, is that “Love will never let you down, ultimately”. We have all had our hearts broken in some way and we have all had to rebuild and restructure, but no matter what happens, loving someone and risking for them is never a mistake. I loved him fully and thoroughly and I tried hard to express this to him. While I held on for a bit too long and found it hard to let go, I know that there is a lesson to be learnt here and I am finding out what that is day by day.

I realized that the only way to move on is to inspire yourself to move on. You need to love and liberate YOURSELF. Take risks in your career, life and friendships. Expand on your knowledge of the world. Go on an adventure. Make new memories. Be free. You can always fall in love again, but you can never get time back. Go and be free.

Love yourself.

 

“Man’s Rejection is God’s Protection”

“Man’s rejection, is God’s protection”

This is a quote that I have been living by lately.

Last week, I was listening to an episode of the Lady Gang podcast featuring Jeannie Mai from The Real. As I was listening, she was discussing a lost opportunity years prior to her success and how that rejection allowed her to find something better and more fulfilling. This quote was enlightening to me and I began to think about all of the times when rejection has spawned an otherwise positive outcome for me.

For example, I had been working in the same seasonal job position from my mid teens into my early 20’s. For the first time in 6 years, I was blindsided when I got an email that stated that my services would not be needed for that upcoming summer. I became frantic and depressed. I took the first job that was offered to me because I was so nervous to be unemployed, even though it wasn’t related to my field. When I went to job orientation, I became suddenly depressed and I knew that it wasn’t for me. I went home and cried but then I suddenly woke up and decided to apply to every job opportunity so that I could focus on my career and not my loss. When I opened my email, the company that I had previously interned at had a position open for me and I jumped at it! I have been there now for 3 years, working in my field of study and loving it.

The rejection in this case was my protection as it allowed me to grow in my career instead of basking in my comfort.

I think about my break up with my ex as well. His rejection was my protection. His rejection allowed me to self reflect and work on the parts of myself that weren’t so great. It also allowed me to learn that self love is the most important factor in life and that we can achieve this through a belief that we have the power to do all things because of a higher power (Call it God or not). I began to believe in the universe and this manifested into me believing in myself. I began to love the others around me more. Mostly, I learned to let go of people and negative situations that no longer served me.

I also learned what I did and didn’t want in a man so that hopefully I will get the chance to get love right in the future.

These were lessons I had to learn.

So, the next time you feel that getting declined for something is the worst thing in the world, always remember this: Man’s rejection is God’s Protection. You won’t see it right away, but you will soon see it manifest into a different and better opportunity.

Some articles:

http://theprayingwoman.com/sometimes-rejection-is-gods-protection/

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/maddisen-k-krown/coping-with-rejection_b_2586145.html

Day 8: Attack

“If the enemy sees that you’re struggling in any area, he will purposefully attack you where you’re weak. Keep praying for God’s power!”

I have been struggling with the thought and wondering of how people stop caring about each other. How does one just stop caring about someone that they loved and cared for deeply? How come the good ones that try their best never get fought for or never get their love reciprocated? Why are we always struggling to find others who will see us for who we truly are? I have been attacked profusely by this idea over the past few days and while I am getting closer to accepting the fact that we are not all able to continuously care for each other, it is harder to accept the fact that people can turn around and be so mean and cold to those who were once so close to them. This does perplex me often. I will keep praying for the strength to continuously show love to others even when I find it hard to show that same love to myself.

Day 5: Feel

“Watch God take you from feeling disappointed to feeling anointed” – Sprinkle of Jesus

I think this quote related directly to being hopeful. Being hopeful gives us the courage to grow and move into new spaces. Instead of being disappointed when things don’t work out, we should learn to feel grateful that they didn’t and hopeful that something new and better will come. This will help us to accomplish the goals and things we need and not just want. Pray on it and it will eventually come to be ❤.

Day 2: Power of Prayer

“Keep praying for your family. God is hearing you.” – Sprinkle of Jesus

This quote means to me that I need to pray for those close to me. Anyone I feel is family even friends need prayer and I need to invest my time and energy into them so that God can continue to bless them.