No More #3Things

Hi Everyone,

I have made a decision to stop writing my #3things posts. To be honest, I was writing them during a time of extremely great depression and while I am still dealing with the residual effects of the depression, I have realized that I don’t need to write out #3things to share with the world whenever I am feeling down or hopeless. I can now cry it out and go for a walk and embrace the world with a smile no matter how challenging it might appear to initially be. I am a little bit more hopeful today that I was 2 months ago and I think that is a blessing in disguise.

Thank you all for reading my posts. I hope to be writing more positive blog content moving forward.

Sincerely,

Alexandria

Advertisements

3 Things (12/05/2018)

1. As of today, this day, I commit myself to becoming a more peaceful and beautiful soul. I want to be able to listen more to the words of others in order to feel their souls. I want to put more happiness into this world. I want to rebuild myself and become a less toxic person. I want to start anew. I want to use my lessons from the past to shape who I am today without altering my personality. My goal is to be a good person and not a bad one like I was before.

2. My negative, pessimistic, and toxic energy has to go. I don’t have time for it anymore. It’s not who I want to be. I need to be the best person I know. That’s how and where I will find my happiness.

3. Something is calling me to work in Italy. I got a job offer to work there and something is telling me like this is the right decision for me. I would go because I feel like a month in the country I have always wanted to visit is the best form of clarity for me. I am searching for myself and my sense of purpose. I may have just found it.

3 Things (16/04/2018)

  1. main-qimg-65e115ac6255f3d56e5e32e69f3a2ae3-cI do not know why I still love and care about someone who doesn’t even think twice about me. It is not a productive thing to do and it certainly doesn’t help me to heal in anyway. I feel like I take three steps forward and then 10 steps back and I know that this will eventually lead to progress but progress feels so slow and bleak. Maybe this just means that I loved harder than he did? I am not so sure and I am not into thinking about the what ifs any longer. Now, I just know that I need to find more strength to let go of the past and the things that I cannot change.
  2. I now see how I messed up in my relationship clearly and I also see how he deserved better. Neither of us were great, and neither of our sides of the streets are clean but we both deserved better than each other and there is healing in realizing this. I just need to forgive myself for my mistakes and to move forward to be happier and to fully heal.
  3. I think that moving away will calm me down in many ways. I need a change in scenery and in life to fully blossom I feel. I have been too trapped and stagnant for too long. I know that in order to change and to grow and to be fully out of the box I am in, moving will go a long way to improving myself and the life I lead. I realized that the purpose of this break up was to show me that my final place isn’t where I am today and that I need to work hard and fight to become the person I was intended to be.

Look At Every Toxic Behaviour In Your Life

7ac4ff9ec3ef0618f8a044601cfed4b5In order to change your life, you need to look at every toxic behaviour in your life.

A lot of people hate to look at themselves and define themselves, especially the ‘ugly’ parts of their personalities. We all have faults and none of us are perfect.

In order to move forward, let go, and understand who YOU are, you need to understand how you got to that place. In order to grow, you need to become more emotionally intelligent. In order to become more emotionally intelligent, you need to understand how your negative (or toxic) behaviours have brought you to the place you are today. Only then can you change your future.

We all make mistakes in our pasts and some are more detrimental than others. It is important to understand that we can change our lives at any moment we decide to for the better. We cannot change the past but we can change the future. Once you understand that you can make your future much brighter than your past ever was, then you can start to grow and change as a person.

Commit to improving yourself by 1% per day, everyday, until you are the best version of you. Then, when you feel that you are the best you can be, put that 1% per  day into maintaining that sense of self you have created. You will feel much happier and healthier mentally when you do so.

Love yourself wholly enough to look at yourself completely. When you make peace with who you used to be, you can become who you NEED to be and your world will become a brighter place.

You can do it.

3 Things (09/04/2018)

  1. Everyone is going through their own personal battles and you never know what it could be. Today, someone in my office began to cry because they had an emergency and I began to wonder if anyone would cry if something happened to me? I also found the hashtag #BraveNotBroken today on Twitter and I realized that my issues aren’t as severe as the issues of others my age, however, they are equally impacting on my life and well being. It was just great to see that I was not as alone as I feel, especially on a day like today.
  2. There is no reason for me to be sad at all today, yet I am. I am quite sad actually. I feel the tears at the back of my eyes. I have so many good things going on in my life right now and I am trying to focus on how amazing and worthwhile these opportunities are for me, yet I am sad. I feel like a high-functioning depressed person. I am sad and depressed yet I am getting things done. Where is the satisfaction though?
  3. I have a job interview for the internship of a lifetime tomorrow and I am just as nervous for it as I am excited. I know that if I fail to get this position for the summer I will be very depressed, however, a part of me is super optimistic and sure about this. My gut is telling me that this is the push personally and professionally that I need in my life at this time. I just hope that everything works out.

Maybe Travelling Will Help?

Since my awful break up this year, I have really felt confined by the space and place I am in. I am finishing up my undergrad and about to start a masters, but I feel trapped in my environment. My goal and hope for the remainder to 2018, is to be able to free my soul through deep mediation and travel.

I want to travel and see new places and create new memories and experiences. If after I travel, I am still unable to be happy with everything in life, then I will determine that most of what I feel is internal and not environmental.

On my travel bucket-list I will be attempting to visit:

  • Spain
  • Ottawa, ON, Canada
  • USA
  • Colombia

Lets see if I actually make it and follow my travel tab to see me write about my experiences.

The Mistakes You Make

a3a1e0eed2fb61b29d4eef4c2c319caf.jpgI am slowly learning day by day, that we all make mistakes. Some are big and some are small, but we all make mistakes. All mistakes can be forgiven, but some can never be forgotten. When our mistakes impact the people in our lives negatively, we must not seek reconciliation, we must look within to discover what within us needs to change.

 

 

When you hurt someone, something is wrong with you. You are manifesting a negative feeling that you are projecting onto another person. The answer to fix the problem is always within yourself.

 

You may never win back the affection of the people you hurt and that is okay. It will hurt and make you sad but always remember that you cannot change the past. You can take the lesson you have learnt and apply it to the future and become a more positive individual. You will make new friends and meet new people. Make sure you don’t make the same mistake twice with the new people that you meet.

When you are happy and you love yourself from within, you won’t make the same mistakes. Remember this, people come into your life for a reason and some stay for only a season. Maybe your mistake caused their season to end abruptly. That’s okay. It just means that their reason was to teach you a lesson about something within yourself that you need to fix.

It’s okay. Learn. Move forward. Forgive yourself. Don’t repeat the mistake.